July 2013

It is so funny watching the boys when we take them out for dinner.  Last night we took the boys to Buffalo Wild Wings and the boys just had a blast. They love the tvs. They love that they can be loud. And they love that they can be kids there. And for us, it makes our lives easier, because the boys can be kids there. And the staff goes out of their way to stop and talk with the boys and interact with them.

And, they love the wings. Mild of course and boneless.   Dinner out is a treat with our schedules during the week, but a family atmosphere is exactly what we needed for our dinner out.

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Life can be sometimes you have to laugh about what is going on, because it is really just too embarrassing to cry in public.  Well, today was one of those days for me. Yesterday morning, after just getting settled into work, I get a call from my wife, her SUV has broken down.  So, I pack up and head back down the road, and this was happening while AAA was taking her SUV to the mechanic.

Well, today I got the call, the call that I was hoping that would not becoming in. My family mechanic said the words “The transmission is shot”. Well crap was my reply and then I started laughing. It wasn’t funny at all, but sometimes you have to laugh, because I didn’t want to start crying in front of co-workers when he told me that it would be close to $5,000 to repair her SUV.
I felt like I had been kicked in the gut. I could not believe that I was having this conversation. I was literally going to make the final payment on the SUV next week.

But the next few things almost brought me to tears. I called my father in law about borrowing his truck, he offered to rent us a car. I called my mom, she offered to drive 5 hours to come and stay with the boys so that my wife and I could go and look at cars. And then my Godfather sent me a text and it read “how much money do you need?”

What is love? When those closest to you offer you everything to help you out, without you even having to say a word. Because as each one of those three important people in my life made their offers, I teared up.  I had not budgeted for or even thought that there would on the radar for another year. I had already started thinking through how we were going to be able to save money. Well, so much for that idea, so sometimes you have to laugh and roll on.

And, now it looks like we are going to be looking for a new SUV.

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Repetition, Repetition and more Repetition. That was the theme from Baby B’s first session with the speech pathologist.

I was really amazed at how the speech pathologist not only interacted with Baby B, but maybe even more importantly, Baby A. And when I offered to take Baby A upstairs, she quickly said that Baby A would be one of her biggest helpers in getting his little brother to talk. So as she was working with the boys, talking with them, showing them different animials and showing them the sign language for them, she was teaching my wife and I what we needed to do to help when she is not there. And it came back to repetition.

Perfect example is that she had a box with paper animals in there. And she was knock on top of the box 3 times (again, repetition) and then she would say open. Well, Baby A, he was all over that, as it only took him seeing that 1 time to figure out what to do. Baby B, he was more observant. Studying what was going on and finally he walked over, knocked on the top of the box 3 times and she said Open and he got a toy out. Well, that just sparked it all. But it was that repetition that got it going.

This morning was a good session for him and for us. It gave us some information and tools that we needed to help out.

And tonight, as I prepare dinner and talk with the boys, I’ll be using as much repetition as possible.

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I am finding that everyday, I’m learning something new from my sons. While driving to work this morning, I started thinking about the boys and that we had a rough night with Baby A. And when I say that it was rough, basically he was acting like a 2 year old. He fussed. He said No a lot. He laid in the floor and pitched a fit and did not want to goto bed.

And this morning, I go and get him out of his room when he woke up and he smiled and said “Hi Daddy”. For him, today is a new day. He didn’t remember how he acted the night before. The only thing that he knew was that he was going to get some milk and that he and his brother were going to chase each other around the living room.

But as I drove to work, I thought about how as adults, we remember. We remember too much sometimes. We remember parts to conversations and hold onto comments and actions. And I wish that we could wake up each morning and simply say that today is a new day and that yesterday is in the past.

 

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I Love You is arguably one of the most powerful phrase in the English language, yet it is so often not used. But every night, my wife and I tell the boys good night and we always tell them, I Love You. And we say it to each boy, because we both want them to know that as individuals, how much we love them.

Well, a few days ago, I was asking Baby A a question and whatever his response was made me laugh. So, I just pulled him close to me and whispered “I Love You” in his ear and gave him a kiss on the head. He looked up and smiled and said “I Love You Daddy”. Well, that was it. I had to wipe the tears away from my eyes at that point.

I do not really remember growing up in a family that said that phrase that much. I am sure that we said it, but I don’t know that it was overly used.  But, I vowed that when I had children that I would say it as often as I could to them, because I always wanted them to know how much they are loved.

So boys, one day you’ll read these blogs and get a glimpse into some of the stories and things that we’ve gone through. I just hope that you know how much I love you and how much you are loved, not just by your mother and myself, but a lot of people.  You have both brought a lot of love and joy to so many lives and we are just lucky to have you both as sons.

 

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Sunday night after dinner, my mother who is in town, said why don’t we get ice cream?  Well that is like asking the kids if they want to go to the park and play, we all know the answer. So after dinner, we went over to get ice cream. And I have to admit, the ice cream shop is smart, because they gave the kids a small cone of vanilla for free and we spent a good $10 on ice cream for the adults. And it was money well spent.

The kids loved having their own cones, even while trying to get licks in off of ours. There is just something about eating ice cream on a hot summer day.  And I am pretty sure that we have started a new family tradition as well.

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George Zimmerman was found not guilty. Not guilty. A jury voted to find him not guilty.

You can look at this case in so many ways. And regardless of what you believe, at the end of the day, 2 things remain true:

1) Mr. Martin is dead and his parents will have to leave the rest of their lives knowing that there son is no longer here. And that he was more importantly, he was taken way too soon.
2) Mr. Zimmerman will have to live the rest of his life knowing that he took the life of Mr. Martin.

I am a firm believer that as individuals, we are all entitled to our own beliefs and those beliefs should be respected. And that being said, regardless of what view you take in this case, a young man’s life was ended.

I am not a lawyer. I am not someone that has followed this case as closely as others. I can only look at this from the stand point of a parent and tonight, Mr. Martin’s parent’s mourn the loss of their son, again.

Tonight, Mr. Zimmerman is found not guilty. I just hope and pray, that those in the state of Florida, know and respect the verdict and avoid any further violence.

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Almost every night before the boys go to sleep, my wife will sing to them and the songs vary every night. Lately, she has been singing Old McDonald and encouraging the boys to say what animals and the sounds that the animals make. Usually, the boys just sit and smile and call out names when asked. Well, this past Friday while we were driving, Baby A out of the blue started singing Old McDonald. Well, it was his version of Old McDonald, but never the less, it was close.

My wife loves to sing, as did her mom, so to hear one of her children sit and sing Old McDonald definitely moved her to tears.  Over the course of the weekend, I was able to actually capture Baby A singing and I have to say, I’ve never smiled so much. It was so innocent and sweet and he was so proud as he sang.

Old McDonald had a farm, ewww ooooo ewwww ewwww ooo. Or that is at least how Baby A sings it.

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What are you grateful for?

A few weeks ago, my wife created a blog and has decided that for the next 6 weeks, she is blogging about what she is grateful for that day. It is amazing in reading her blog, how many little things I take for granted in my busy day. Looking up at a sunset. A quiet moment while drinking a cup of coffee. Listening to the boys talking to each other before they go to sleep.

I am trying to slow down my life. Look at things differently. Prioritize my day and most importantly, be grateful for the little things.

So, what are you grateful for?

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This has been a weekend that we have been looking forward to for awhile, because it is one of our two weekends a year that we get to spend in the country.

For 2 days, we get to sleep in, as our friends will take care of the boys so that we can rest and relax. We will play with the boys, let them run around with the dogs, play outside in the open backyard.
The last time that we spent the weekend in the country, I slept for 12 hours. I can not remember the last time that I got more than 6 hours of sleep.

We don’t get many chances to take a weekend to get away to the country, but this is one that I’ve been looking forward to for about 6 months.

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