Rules

A few nights ago my Godfather sent me an email with a link to 28 Rules for Fathers & I thought that I would share it here and then maybe add a few additions to it.  Let’s be honest, all guys when they find out that they are having kids are scared to death, hell I was, let alone finding out that we were having twins. But a few take aways from the Rules for Fathers:

1) Love his Mother – Be a good role model and let your sons see the love that you have for your wife and I promise, one day a young lady that your son will bring home to meet you, will thank you. Show them that it is good to be lovely, supportive and attentive.

4) Take him to a ball game – I would actually expand this to to teaching him about sports in general. There is something unique about playing a game, because in life, there are winners and losers, just like in sports. But there are also life lessons that come with winning and losing too. Because in winning, it is how you win and how you show that expression at the end of the game. Do you line up and congratulate the other team or do you rub it in their faces? And with losing, do you hold your head down or do you hold it up, because you busted your butt and gave it everything that you had?  Those same life lessons apply to life.

16) Father him – A father isn’t just a part time person. A father isn’t just there for the concept. But a father is the one that will teach and show his children how to live. A father needs to over use the words “I Love You”, because at the end of the day, those kids are going to be looking to their father for support or answers or approval. And NO child should ever wonder about their father’s love.

28) Be his hero – Kids need someone to look up to. They need good role models. They want to be just like their dad’s when they grow up, so do what is right and teach them right from wrong at an early age. And don’t let some punk musician be their hero either.

A few Rules for Fathers that I would add:

Winning and Losing – It is part of life, it is a part of sports, but it is a fact in life that there will be someone that will win and someone that will lose. The difference is, how hard you work to get there. If you put forth zero effort, you’ll lose every time. But if you bust your butt, you’ll win, maybe not every time, but you’ll win and you’ll get ahead. You’ll get ahead in the game, you’ll get ahead in school and you’ll get ahead in life.

Learn to Cook – Show your kid that your wife isn’t the only one that can cook in the house. In fact, let all the guys cook for mom one night. It gets the kids excited about what they eat and doing something nice for their mom and maybe it turns into a hobby that they enjoy.

Laugh at yourself – Don’t take life so serious. We all make mistakes, but it is how we handle those mistakes that separate us.

Believe in something – I’m not saying believe in God, or Buddha or whatever, but have a faith in something. It helps give meaning and perspective in life. It helps keep us grounded.

and finally, Be Humble – This kinda goes in with the manners, but in life, I feel that we all get dealt a handle, but be gracious and be humble with the hand that you are dealt. Say thank you. Be respectful. It will be noticed. Remember that in life, there is always at least 1 other person that is worse off than you. There is always 1 other person that is dealing with something worse than you. There is always 1 person that is going through a life altering moment and though what you might be dealing with in that very moment, doesn’t compare to things that other are facing right then.

I really enjoyed reading the 28 Rules for Fathers because it really got me thinking and evaluating what I was doing in how I was raising my sons. But it also got me thinking about how I was raised. What I went through and how my life was shaped by my father.

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