September 2016

Homework in Kindergarten? Seriously? What about having fun? Playing? Learning from playing and doing? Heck, I even remember and yes, I’m dating myself, but I remember a nice nap after lunch.

But homework? Seems a little much for me, but who am I to judge?  But now that we are 4 weeks into school, it seems that we are slowly adjusting, even for the school work each night. And yes, I said that correctly, the boys have homework every night, minus Friday night.

It is sad that my boys are basically doing what I did in 1st grade and being forced to grow up even faster than any of us would like. But what are we to do?

So tonight, I’m making tater tots and chicken nuggets for dinner and letting the boys have a hour to relax. They played outside and played with a friend and after dinner, we’ll do homework and take baths.

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The word that I used with my mom tonight when she asked how I was doing, was simply “defeated”. We got another call from Boy B’s teacher, it wasn’t as bad as last weeks, but it still wasn’t great.

This time, he was great in the class room, but not in his special classes, i.e. PE and Media Center. And though she said that he was great in his class, he didn’t make good choices. And I think that when my wife mentioned that the teacher suggested that we contact his Dr. (i.e. subtle for possible need for medication), I hit a low point for the day.

I don’t want my kids to be on medicine for behavior concerns at this age. I have too many resources, but this is part of raising twin boys. The perfect storm of being born early, boys and twins and the 2nd child. And as I took a deep breath and muddled the words “I feel defeated”, my mother, who never raises her voice came down on me like a ton of bricks. She said that I needed to hear. She got on me for the right reason. She got on me because I wasn’t focusing on the right things.

We talked through Boy B’s day. What was different than yesterday and the day before. We talked through his sleep pattern, his eating, etc. And then we figured out that the day was different. There was not a lot of transition time. He didn’t enough breakfast. His schedule was off this morning due to it being a Wednesday and the class schedule changed, etc. it all became the perfect storm.

So as I drove home from work, after a really long day, a few things came to mind.

  1. I’m beyond fortunate that my mom has a background in teaching and that she can help me with these types of issues.
  2. When I call and say that I’m defeated, that she knows exactly what I need to hear and builds me up, instead of letting me tear myself down.
  3. And she gave me the same loving advice, that I hope that I can pass along to my boys one day.

So that feeling of being defeated, some how changed into, how can we make tomorrow better. And I hope that tomorrow will be better and that he make’s better choices.

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9-11 Memorial

15 years later and the tragic moments of 9/11 seem just like it was yesterday.

15 years later and I still remember where I was when I heard that the planes had hit the World Trade Center.

15 years later, I still remember my professor at UNCW dismissed our class and we all hurried to get to a tv.

15 years later, I still remember getting word that my friends that worked and lived in New York, were safe and sound.

And 15 years later, I still pray for those that lost their lives that day. Today, we mourn the loss of those that died, due to no fault of their own. Today, I pray for their families and pray for comfort and peace. Today, I am very grateful that when I last visited the World Trade Center Memorial, that I didn’t have to look for the photos of my friends on the wall.

And 15 years later, time still stands still as I remember the moment that our world forever changed.
But as I was reflect back to what Mister Rogers had to say about 9/11 and I don’t know that I could have said it any better myself.

So today, 15 years after a day that we’ll never forget, let’s put aside political differences and let’s focus on what really matters today.

9-11 Memorial

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The first day of school came and went, mostly without any issues. I say mostly, but it wouldn’t be fun without some problem.

On the night before the boys first day of school, we packed their lunches, got all of their clothes out, read some books and talked about riding the bus and going to school. All good. And it didn’t hurt that they were both exhausted too.

And now that we are 3 weeks into school, I can honestly say that for the most part, the boys have really transitioned nicely into kindergarten. They have taken a great interest into reading and wanting to learn how to read. They are more engaged in learning new things and they have shown an excitement in doing their best at school and even have asked to do chores around the house.

Because my mother taught elementary school for over 4o years, it is easy and also hard for me to watch them goto school.  The days have changed and the expectations have changed. When I grew up, kindergarten was meant to be a transition from preschool and a bridge for 1st grade, but today, that is all changed. Today, kindergarten is what I experienced as 1st grade. And that is really sad in many regards, especially when I see that they only get 15 minutes a day to have recess. And if you ask any teacher, they will tell you that 15 minutes a day of recess isn’t enough and that children, especially little boys, learn better by doing.

All in all, the boys really seem to have transitioned really nicely into a new phase of their life.

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