It is time. It is time to say goodby to my grandfather, who for years was there for me. He believed in me, when I didn’t see it in myself.

When it was time for me to move to Texas, my father asked my grandfather if I was ready and he said “it is time.” And it was.

You see, with my grandfather, time is a key component to his life. He was a farmer so his crops were time sensitive. He and I talked on Saturdays and that too was time sensitive.

But his death, I feel was also based on time. He and I talked every Saturday, for the last 20 plus years. And 2 Saturdays ago, we talked and he could barely get more than two sentences out, but his words were meaningful:

Take care of your children and your wife. Love them. And I will miss our Saturday talks. I love you.

And just like that, the conversation was over. It was over, because not only was he tired and was struggling to get those words out, but it was over, because it was time. He said what he needed to say and I replied with a simple Yes Sir and I love you.

Time is a precious thing. It is based on time and moments, but also hugs and love. These past few days, there has been a lot of hugs and love and in a few moments, time seemed to stand still.

When the US Army Color Guard played Taps, I cried. When they folded the flag and saluted my father, who is a retired US Full Bird Col., I really cried. Because it really hit me, that my grandfather was gone.

Yes, I saw him and took the boys to the visitation and they both went to see the body with my wife, while I stayed in the hallway. But in the sense of time, the visitation stood still. I saw friends and family that I have not seen in years. I saw friends that my dad had in both his professional and military life that I have not seen in years.

And as each person sought me out, I realized, that not only in that moment in time, did life seem ok. But more importantly, that in that moment of time, life was ok, because I was still close to my grandfather.

Time is important, both here in the present and also in the past.

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Where does the time go? I literally just had my son yell down form the bathtub that he had washed himself and his hair at bath time.  It seems like a few days ago, he was calling me to bath him.

My mom and I were talking this morning about when I was my son’s age and things that I went through and did and my mom paused and asked “where does the time go? I remember like it was yesterday you were doing the same thing that your sons are doing.”

Time, it is an important thing and something that we can’t get back and we aren’t promised tomorrow. So enjoy the time that we have today, with our family and our loved ones.

Growing up, my dad didn’t spend a lot of time with me or at least if he did, I really don’t remember it. And that isn’t a knock against him. He was doing what he thought was right for our family. But those things came with a sacrifice. And as a child, I decided that I wouldn’t follow in my father’s footsteps and that I would do something different. So, I choose time. I choose to spend time with my children today, because I am not promised tomorrow.

So, a few weeks ago, we got an email from our teacher and without looking at my work schedule, I hit reply to the email with a quick response of “count me in.” And then I realized what I did. I committed to being a chaperone on my son’s field trip, without asking for time off from work, clearing my work calendar, etc. But, I was able to move my meetings to the next day or the following week, my boss is great and didn’t hesitate to say yes to my request off and tomorrow, I get to spend TIME with my son’s on their class field trip with school.

The lesson that I want my son’s to learn is very simple. I choose time with them over work, things that I wanted to do, etc. I chose time with them over basketball or baseball games. I chose them over everything, because they are the most important people that I want to spend my time with.

So, tomorrow, we goto the zoo, with a lot of little kids.

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Yesterday, for just an hour, I wasn’t connected to a phone or computer. For just an hour, I didn’t have to check email or text messages from the office.

For just an hour, I didn’t have to worry about life or think about life. But I did get to escape. I got to walk about from the distractions of life and clear my head.

Last night, I went to bed and knew that I was coming down with a sinus infection and I knew that I was more than likely going to be at home today with the boys, as one of them was not feeling well. And getting up this morning, I knew within 15 minutes what my day was going to look like and honestly, I wasn’t that far off.

Boy B has a cold. Boy A when told that he was going to daycare alone, freaked out. Could they both have gone to daycare, sure. I am just one that errors on the side of caution, especially with the holidays coming up.

Today consisted of the Boy B taking medicine for his cold (honey) and my trying to work and rest. Tonight, after my wife got home, I cooked dinner and got everyone ready for bed. Sure, I still have a sore throat and my ears are clogged up, but my kids don’t care. I mean, they do, but they still need guidance in getting them ready for bed.

But as I was rocking the boys to sleep, I thought back to yesterday and in how an hour, changed my outlook of the day. And today, I missed not having an hour alone without interruption, but the realty is that the boys will only be this age for a little long and at some point, they will not want to spend the day with me. They will not want to sit in my lap.

And in that moment, I wanted just an hour from today, to stand still in time.

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Every night before it is time to get in bed, the boys sing songs with either my wife or myself. But Baby A will usually get in our laps, sing and when it is time to go to bed, in the cutest voice, he says “Rock a Minute”.

One day soon, I know that “Rock a Minute” will turn into me asking him if I can rock him to sleep. Before today, “Rock a Minute” turns into rocking 10 minutes.

So tonight, after a long day at work, dealing with traffic, feeding the boys, getting them ready for bed, I look forward to Baby A asking to “Rock a Minute”.

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Some times in life, you have to fall off the grid and that is exactly what I am doing. Every year, I try to do something for me and that is taking time off. Taking time off to evaluate where I am today, where I want to go tomorrow.

One of my closest friends is a psychologist and he has always said, you have to take care of yourself first and foremost, because if you do not, no one else will.

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